Why Do We Need a Car Accident Before We Put a Stop Sign or a Stop Light?!

Nancy Friedman, R.S.W. - Registered Social Worker

Research found that children exposed to family violence show the same pattern of activity in their brains as soldiers exposed to combat. While this adaptation may help children detect danger in the short term, it also activates brain circuits associated with anxiety disorders, increasing the risk of long-term mental health issues.

Here are some examples of behaviors that individuals involved in partner violence report that they and/or their partners identify: called names and/or criticized the other partner, tried to keep the other from doing something the other partner wanted to do. e.g. said cannot go out with friends or go to a meeting, gave the partner angry stares or looks, prevented the partner from having money for own use and ended a discussion by making a unilateral decision.

Partner violence has many causes. Some examples are the desire for power and control, feeling that their way is the right way, learned behaviors following their parents’ role model, external stressors like financial difficulties, communication breakdowns, substance abuse or untreated mental health conditions.     

In my 38 years of experience providing counselling to individuals, couples and families dealing with these challenges, I hear their pain and regret about their actions and a desire and motivation to end the violence toward the people they love and provide a safe and loving home for their children.

Coming to counselling is not the same as going to a car wash: Soap, Hot Water, Air and Go.

It is important to understand what the contributing factors to the challenges are to be able to assist the clients in learning different ways to express their emotions, communicate effectively and find compromised solutions that work for everyone, including the children.

I feel proud to receive feedback from my clients that thanks to my care, attention, and remarkable knowledge, they found many answers to their questions and are happy with the person they have become, having grown and discovered much about each other and themselves. I’d be honored to walk alongside you to assist you in achieving your goals.

Prevention is the best protection!